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The dangling entrails of more movie trailers

Posted on Monday, October 15th, 2007 under Reviews | No comments

The title for this post seems fitting, seeing as how the many of the movies currently out and/or being promoted are of horrible quality/substance. Let’s see if we can find anything worth watching …

Southland Tales – Neither Jodie or myself know what this movie is about. Seriously, this could be a trailer for any movie … or even a movie just pieced together with clips from 10 other movies. Would it help anything if I had seen Donnie Darko?

Jimmy Carter – Man From the Plains – Do you think Jimmy was the one that picked the hip-hop soundtrack for this trailer? ;) But seriously, this will probably be a thought-provoking documentary that my father would enjoy.

When Did You Last See Your Father – It’s like a girlie movie … but for guys and their dads. Hmm. I almost feel inclined to see it because of how much I have enjoyed Jim Broadbent in movies like Hot Fuzz and Moulin Rouge! (and Vanity Fair, too, says Jodie).

One Missed Call – Jodie says “creepifying and stupid”. I personally feel more threatened by the cellphone companies and their ominous fees than I do by a baby-cradle ringtone. It seems as though horror movies are running the full gamut of making ordinary things seem scary to us. With showers, beaches, parking lots and now cellphones causing us so much fear, I can only assume my toothbrush is going to be the next on the list to seek revenge. Shall I suggest a title of … “Did you remember to brush”? Dum dum dun.

King Corn – So if we understood this correctly, everything we eat is made out of corn … which means, that if corn is bad for me and corn is everything I eat, my only choices are corn or death. Hmm. Good to know.

Juno – This looks genuinely entertaining and intriguing, especially because of Rainn Wilson (from The Office) and Michael Cera (of Arrested Development). Fun!

The Final Season – Hey, it’s Rudy, but for baseball!

Moondance Alexander – Jodie wants to know why Black Beauty is painted like a cow. I say the only thing this movie has going for it is a scene with Don Johnson and his ‘71 yellow Cuda.

Enchanted – Agh! Are you kidding me?!? Wasn’t there already some crappy made for tv movie like this? I’m sure there was … and even if there wasn’t, we still don’t need this. Ugh … it depresses me to know that I will at some point have to watch some part of this movie.

Youth Without Youth – Huh? What? Okay … apparently I will have to wait until they put out a real trailer, before I can even decide if this is a movie or just an advertisement for roses and pocket-watches.

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